So very very bad at updating this...

I have actually written several posts - in my head - but haven't got round to actually typing things up. It's been a very hectic start to the year, and not really a happy one.

One of DH's ex-students committed suicide, and as is usually the case it was the one who was the friendliest, cleverest, the one he'd kept in touch with, the one who really should have had a long life. Unfortunately, she suffered with depression (we now know) and just couldn't cope with this planet anymore. She made a very brave decision and is going to be missed by everyone whose life she touched.

My mom's husband got made redundant. Just called into the office one Wednesday morning and told he has no job anymore. Well, I say made redundant... He had to go for an "interview" with them on the Friday and they told him he hadn't worked long enough to get redundancy pay. So he's looking for a job.

I've got one friend who's suffering with an unrequited love like a teenager, it's his first and somehow it seems acceptable hearing all the woe woe is me coming from a 14 year old - it's not so acceptable when he's 30 and is going on about how his life is over and he'll never find another love... I've another friend who's just had a major operation and looks like Sweeney Todd has been at him. Definitely lost a lot of sleep over that one, hoping that he pulls through the anaesthetic, that the surgeon doesn't mess up, etc. Another friend has had a small stroke and is in hospital too.

And me. How am I? Well the specialist finally agreed to a hysterectomy. Am on the waiting list and it's going to be about 18 weeks. I'm trying to deal with it practically. At the moment I am in so much pain, not just once a month but practically every single day. Therefore having everything taken away will be better for me. I mean, it's costing £20.55 a month for meds at the moment - and that's not counting pain killers and heated back wraps.

That's a good point I guess. I've also taken time off school. The pain makes me incredibly cranky and the lads were getting too much for me. I came down with a cold, lost my voice so took nearly two weeks off. I usually just go in and cope, but this time I couldn't. I tried to go back and lasted half a day - I really thought I was going to end up killing someone. I've been so wound up that I missed Imbolc...

On the plus side, I managed to knit a Swallowtail Shawl for my mommy in 3 weeks.

I'm hoping February improves with every day.